It will be home

May 27, 2017

Everything about this move still feels very surreal and like it’s happening to someone else. It doesn’t feel like I’m leaving on Friday, and yet when I think about the date looming ahead of me, it rips opens a deep dark hole inside of me. I know, this sounds dramatic and pathetic, but it’s true. I never expected this area to be my home, but it has become so much so that it’s so hard to think of leaving it. 

We’ve been here longer than anywhere we’ve ever lived before and I’ve built a life I love. My kids have been raised here, this is their home. I have friends I love so much they became my family; my sisters, the aunts and uncles to my children. I’m no fool and I have always known that because of the military, moving was not just a possibility, but a probability. For the longest time, I would have welcomed the change to go somewhere new. 

I will build another life I'll love and I'll make more friends. i will still have all of my other friends, just a bit further away. I will be fine and I will have what is most important in my life, which is my family. With them, it will be home, no matter where we are. 

The kids seem excited about it, albeit somewhat confused on Gryphon’s part. He “knows” we’re moving to Alaska, and keeps asking to go, but he has no idea what is ahead of us. He keeps asking where his dresser is or his toybox or his books. Victoria seems like she is completely ok with the idea, so I guess that is good. Kids are so much more resilient than we give them credit for and I should take lessons in their acceptance of this.

Many of the rooms in our house are empty or close to it now. We have 5 bedrooms. One of the guest rooms and Victoria’s room are completely empty. We’ve moved Victoria into the other guest room

which has her matters and scattered blankets and boxes in it, though not much else. Gryphon’s room has his bed and an empty bookshelf at this point. Our room has our bed, a nightstand, and his dresser. The living room is down to one couch and a few other pieces of furniture and the kitchen is still fairly full. The truck is filling up quickly, but should have more than enough room to fit what is left into it.