Wednesday, October 7, 2015

The Mommy Club



***disclaimer....I may or may not have had like a whole bottle of wine by myself while watching this movie before I decided to write this.***
 
As I’m sitting here, watching The Single Mom’s Club, I can’t help but think about how much it applies to married mothers as well. We all want and need support. Many of us get that from our husbands (when they’re not gone on business trips or deployments or in training), but many don’t.

Even with getting the support when needed, we still need each other. We still need other mom’s and other women in our lives. We need to be able to look at the best in one another and let each other cry on our shoulders. We need to have a chance to vent and scream and laugh and be women, as well as moms. We need to be able to rely on one another to watch our children, to talk about our fears and our dreams, to talk about our past and our future, to exchange recipes and craft ideas, to go shopping together and get coffee or lunch. We need to be able to drink wine or beer freely together and just let loose once in a while. We need to open ourselves up, which is really hard to do as an adult, to go to playdates, so not only our children get some time with others (you know, socializing and all), but so that we can talk to another adult. We need to socialize with each other, regardless of age or color or religion or political affiliation. We need to be able to talk about the latest trends and workouts, the latest foods and drinks, the things that hold us back and the ideas that keep us going. We need to not feel lost in who WE are. We are not JUST moms. While we love our children, we need to be us too. We need to feel sexy to our husbands (or wives or boy or girlfriends or lovers or whatever floats your boat), we need to feel confident that we are good people and funny and creative and shy and outgoing and spunky and witty and intelligent and caring and everything else that goes with being us.

So many of us feel lost. Who are we? Are we doing good enough? For our kids? For our loves? For ourselves? Am I working too much? Should I be working instead of raising kids? Is the house clean enough? Is dinner healthy enough? Are the kids doing good in school? Are they happy? …..the thing is….when was the last time you asked…AM I HAPPY?

So, go to the next playdate. Go get coffee. Go to the park. Go meet other moms. Make a new friend. It’s not easy. No one said it was. Take that step (a few times at least!!!) and maybe you’ll meet that perfect mommy match. You have something in common, talk about the kids. Ask how old they are. Tell the other mom their kids are cute. Talk about what school they go to. Then….then the hard part….invite them, in person, to do something else…not just invite them to be your “friend” on social media. GO. DO. SOMETHING. WITH. THEM. This is how we have to make friends. Use your kids as an excuse…I don’t care. We all need our Mommy Club. Make one. Make a friend. Do this for you.

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