I must be crazy...

OMG! I feel like I must be crazy with everything going on in my life right now...granted, none of it is bad, but it's definitely a lot going on. Let me tell you...

My house increased 100% for the week of Thanksgiving, adding Grandma and Grandpa, their dog, and my nephew (4 years old). It was a lot of fun, just busy having that many folks in my house at once. Then, Sunday after turkey day, I started my shots for fertility. Monday I started a new job and our guests headed back home. ((The job, since everyone keeps asking, is a sales rep for a local magazine.)) This Christmas we will be driving to visit my family (a good 3 day drive) with two 4 year olds and a dog. Sometime early next year, My Love will be deployed.
There are some other things going on too, but I can't quite talk about that yet. Anyhow, it will be a busy, crazy next few months...

It could always be worse and I have to remember that. I have a husband that loves me and is here every night he can be. I have a beautiful daughter who is sweet and caring and clever and snuggly. I have the support of my family and friends. I have faith in God and know that He works in mysterious ways. So, while life is crazy, it is not bad, not bad at all.

A video to watch

One of my bloggie friends, Bobbi shared a video that her husband made about infertility for her.

They  suffered from secondary infertility and she is now pregnant with their son, Tristan, after 2.5 years of trying and finally getting success with an FET transfer (after a failed IVF). Their daughter, Ella, helps out with the video in the end and it is a beautiful. I have so many of the same thoughts as what is seen in this video, (though we still have no end in sight...no pregnancy to celebrate with) and it is true of infertility regardless of whether it is primary or secondary.

Anyhow, here is the video:



Enjoy!!

Starting Sunday...

Starting Sunday I will be injecting myself with all sorts of meds...yup, AF finally showed up. I think it was like a 60 day cycle...argh!

Anyhow, hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. We sure ate some amazing food. Life is about to get crazy hectic for me and I'm not sure which way to turn next, but I'm going to just try to go with the flow...

Monday I start a new job. I will be selling advertising in a local relocation magazine and am very excited about that! Monday the grandparents and nephew head out also and My Love goes back to work, so V will be with a babysitter all day.

Tuesday, V and I need to go get our Flu shots and then she has school and I have TONS of homework to do...just started a new class this week.

I am sure that on Wednesday my new boss will want to run some appointments with me, so I will probably be working again and the same thing Thursday.

Friday I will be taking V to school again and doing more homework.

All during this time I will shoving needles in my tummy and praying that my ovaries do their jobs and make some eggs (NO cysts!!).

Christmas is coming and I have to go shopping and it's just going to be crazy for me...tons of craziness...

Here are some pics from the week:

Anyhow, please pray for guidance for me in the coming months for many things and please pray for My Friend & family. I pray that their struggles untangle themselves and that the resolution to their problems comes peacefully. (that's about all I can say). I love you My Friend.

Bring it on!

So, I picked up my meds and got my fertility orders from Nurse D. yesterday morning. Holy moly it is a LOT! Once AF shows, I will be on 2 vials of Gonal-F and 1 vial of Menopur each day. This is more than I have ever done so far. I am ready to do more. I have yet to get more than 1 egg, so am ready to get my 3 and get this done! :) It will have been 2 years on fertility drugs in January.

Took my last Provera today, so AF should be here any day now...just in time for My Love to get home. He has been gone for the last 4 weeks and we have missed him.

We have family in town for Thanksgiving. My mother and father-in-law, their dog, and my nephew. We are so blessed to have him (A) here right now. V is LOVING it!! A and V have been playing and giggling and have yet to really argue or fight! It's awesome! They are the same age, so it makes it really fun.

Ok, back to the giggling 4 year olds! Will post pics soon!

Falling Leaves

It is beautiful here in the Fall. My yard is COVERED in leaves and we have been having a lot of fun playing in them. Life is going very well right now and I am just enjoying it day by day. Here are some pictures:

A productive day

Today was actually a very productive day.

I talked to Nurse D about where my prescription was...apparently it got called into the wrong pharmacy...oops.

I cleaned up the house this morning and did some laundry as well as made a couple of very important phone calls.

I got a job today and it's in a field that I am not only good at, it's what I am going to college for!!

Took V to preschool and headed to the library to do homework (which I finished!).

When we got home I raked the front yard and cleaned out the new car. We bought a little gas-save Honda Accord very inexpensively but it needed the windows cleaned (badly).

I made a delicious dinner and we watched a movie then the Lil miss when to bed and here I sit.

Here...some pictures!

Before

After

 

 

 

My Birthday Girl

You see birthdays...

One of my dear friends' littlest one turned 1 today. She is gorgeous and I love her. :)
And while I wish her the happiest first birthday, in the dark infertile corner of my mind, I fall apart.

This is not just to one person...this is to LOTS of people...While you may see your baby's first birthday...I see 1 year and 9 months that have passed without ever seeing a positive pregnancy test and countless needles...1 year, 9 months of hormones, stress, emotions, and lots of tears.

I know that in that same time I have had some of the best blessings with my life, my husband, and my daughter, but it doesn't ease the ache in my heart for another baby.

Anyhow...I didn't mean to have to somewhat whiny posts in two days, but I have had several friends have babies in the past few days and several who have celebrated first birthdays within the last few months (and some coming up)...it just gets to ya.

On a separate note, I had a great time today at a local festival. :)
I got nauseous riding the rides (too much spinning!)...never any fun, but I feel much better now. 

Here is our pumpkins from Halloween:

What now?

Let me start by saying that life is good. It really is. I love my husband soooo much and I love my daughter more than I could ever put into words. I have a lot going on in my life right now. I have blessings falling on me from all sorts of directions and it's wonderful. I had a job interview the other day and it went fantastically. I contacted my RE today and told them I am ready to go the next go-round with medicines and she said (and I quote) "We're going to HOP you up on medicines and we're going to make this work!"...I hope she's right. With all the blessings I have going on...I still want that one...I want that baby in my arms...
I have been soooo good lately with seeing everyone's blossoming bellies and watching their babies turn 1 and even 2 years old and not being jealous...but for some reason the past few days have gotten to me. I am hating seeing the pregnancy and newborn complaints and seeing everyone getting ready to celebrate their babies birthdays...3 years...who would've thought it??? oh well....

Happy Birthday Bailey!

My dog turned 9 years old today! I can hardly believe it!! I remember bringing her home when she was just 6 weeks old. My best friend and I drove like 12 hours (one way) to go pick her up and bring her back home as a surprise Christmas gift for My Love. He always wanted a Weimaraner, so I found a female runt because we lived in an apartment at the time and we wanted a smaller Weim than normal. She has been such a blessing in our lives and has been our baby and is still our puppy to this day. 

Happy 9th Birthday Bailey! 

We love you!!