Saturday, November 5, 2011

You see birthdays...

One of my dear friends' littlest one turned 1 today. She is gorgeous and I love her. :)
And while I wish her the happiest first birthday, in the dark infertile corner of my mind, I fall apart.

This is not just to one person...this is to LOTS of people...While you may see your baby's first birthday...I see 1 year and 9 months that have passed without ever seeing a positive pregnancy test and countless needles...1 year, 9 months of hormones, stress, emotions, and lots of tears.

I know that in that same time I have had some of the best blessings with my life, my husband, and my daughter, but it doesn't ease the ache in my heart for another baby.

Anyhow...I didn't mean to have to somewhat whiny posts in two days, but I have had several friends have babies in the past few days and several who have celebrated first birthdays within the last few months (and some coming up) just gets to ya.

On a separate note, I had a great time today at a local festival. :)
I got nauseous riding the rides (too much spinning!)...never any fun, but I feel much better now. 

Here is our pumpkins from Halloween:


  1. I love the three-eyed pumpkin!!!

    :( to the rest of your post. I'm sorry the hurt keeps on being exacerbated by others' happy news. It really does hurt, and you can't help but think about time. I just told DH yesterday that it would be great if this donor embryo cycle results in twins, because if you think about it, if we were fertile and actually conceived 3 years ago when we first started trying, we'd probably be ready to have another now anyway!! crrrazy!

    ~Cherbear (Blogger is being a PITA)

  2. Hey anytime you want get together, I'm down! I always love connecting with new people. Good luck with the Provera. I'll be starting good ol' birth control pills next week since Provera doesn't do anything for me. I need to have an HSG done next cycle. Gah!