My doorbell rang tonight...

The doorbell rang tonight…

The TV was on, probably too loud, but I swore that I heard the doorbell ring...a doorbell didn't fit into the show on TV. It was after 9pm, who could it…my heart briefly stopped. I got up and walked to the door. I turned on the front porch light and looked through the peep-hole.

It was my neighbor’s son, it was no big deal, really. I haven’t heard from My Love in a few days and...

Who knew such a familiar sound could cause a mini-panic attack? A military spouse. A military spouse whose love is deployed. 

I don’t dwell on negative thoughts or anything. It’s rare for me to think like that, but the timing…oh, man.  Like I said...mini heart-attack, and a huge sigh of relief after.

This is real...this is lonely...and scary...and too real.

Military Spouse Appreciation Day

In Honor of Military Spouse Appreciation Day I thought I would share this. I found it on a fellow blogger's, Not Just An Army Wife's, blog and thought it to be quite perfect. :)


Lots of moving...
Moving...
Moving...
Moving far from home...
Moving two cars, three kids and one dog...all riding with HER of course.
Moving sofas to basements because they won't go in THIShouse; Moving curtains that won't fit; Moving jobs and certifications and professional development hours.
Moving away from friends;
Moving toward new friends;
Moving her most important luggage: her trunk full of memories.

Often waiting...
Waiting...
Waiting...
Waiting for housing.
Waiting for orders.
Waiting for deployments.
Waiting for phone calls.
Waiting for reunions.
Waiting for the new curtains to arrive.
Waiting for him to come home,
For dinner...AGAIN!

They call her 'Military Dependent', but she knows better:
She is fiercely In-Dependent.

She can balance a check book;
Handle the yard work;
Fix a noisy toilet;
Bury the family pet...

She is intimately familiar with drywall anchors and toggle bolts.
She can file the taxes;
Sell a house;
Buy a car;
Or set up a move...
.....all with ONE Power of Attorney.

She welcomes neighbors that don't welcome her.
She reinvents her career with every PCS; Locates a house in the desert, The Arctic, Or the deep south.
And learns to call them all 'home'.
She MAKES them all home.

Military Wives are somewhat hasty...
They leap into:
Decorating,
Leadership,
Volunteering,
Career alternatives,
Churches,
And friendships.
They don't have 15 years to get to know people.
Their roots are short but flexible.
They plant annuals for themselves and perennials for those who come after them.

Military Wives quickly learn to value each other:
They connect over coffee,
Rely on the spouse network,
Accept offers of friendship and favors.
Record addresses in pencil...

Military Wives have a common bond:
The Military Wife has a husband unlike other husbands; his commitment is unique.
He doesn't have a 'JOB'
He has a 'MISSION' that he can't just decide to quit...
He's on-call for his country 24/7.
But for her, he's the most unreliable guy in town!
His language is foreign
TDY
PCS
OPR
SOS
ACC
BDU
ACU
BAR
CIB
TAD
And so, a Military Wife is a translator for her family and his.
She is the long- distance link to keep them informed; the glue that holds them together.

A Military Wife has her moments:
She wants to wring his neck;
Dye his uniform pink;
Refuse to move to Siberia;
But she pulls herself together.
Give her a few days,
A travel brochure,
A long hot bath,
A pledge to the flag,
A wedding picture,
And she goes.
She packs.
She moves.
She follows.

Why?
What for?
How come?
You may think it is because she has lost her mind.
But actually it is because she has lost her heart .
It was stolen from her by a man,
Who puts duty first,
Who longs to deploy,
Who salutes the flag,
And whose boots in the doorway remind her that as long as he is her Military Husband, She will remain his military wife.
And would have it no other way.

Busy...so very, very busy!!

Oh my! I haven't blogged in a VERY long time!!

Ever since My Love deployed I have been staying very busy!

I guess I should update!

My nephew is no longer living with us. I was just not a great me with both kids...having insta-twins was hard!! He is happy, healthy, and VERY loved where he is.

My daughter is doing so good in school! She is reading a TON of sight words and sounding everything out. She is writing letters to Daddy and loves to draw and color. She likes to draw/design dresses and clothing. She wants long hair but doesn't brush it very well and hardly ever lets me pull it up or fix it (this drives me crazy!). She is a girly girl who will climb in a mud-puddle, salt slugs, or ride the scary rides at the carnival!

I built and planted a garden (using the square foot garden method), I am building a flower bed in the front yard, I went down to Florida with a friend, still in school full-time, getting back to work, hanging out with a bunch of good friends, and trying to go to different events around town.

I do want to write more another time...tonight...I'm going to bed!

Ok, after this....photo BOMB!!  

OpLove Photos

ALL military families should know about OpLove! OpLove is a program through local professional photographers that volunteer their time and talent to take photos for families of deploying soldiers. An album of the photos is then sent to the soldier overseas to help boost morale. If you would like to purchase photos for yourself after your session, you are always welcome to. 

We chose a good friend of mine, Katherine, to do our photos. We love them and here are a few of those photos!

That being said, yes, My Love has deployed. We miss him and prayers are appreciated. If you are a military family approaching, during, or just after deployment (or know of another family with the same situation), please have them contact OpLove. It's free and it's soooo worth it!

Attention problems?

Have you ever dealt with a child with attention problems? Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)?

One of my best friends is struggling with her son being diagnosed with this (Along For the Ride) and I know of many others. My brother-in-law, my father-in-law, my nephews...

It is hard to think that a child just simply can't control themselves, but that is what it is like for them...for some kids, it's like they have ants in their pants...or brains...and just can't stop doing whatever it is that they are doing (talking, squirming, bouncing) and others pull away from crowds or can't concentrate on anything that is not "stimulating" (television, video games). Some kids, even if it is stimulating, can't concentrate on anything for more than a few minutes either. It's easy to say that they just were never made to, or that they don't want to, but it's literally because they CAN'T. They don't know how. With the right kinds of counseling and possibly medication though, it can be controlled and the child can learn to control themselves.

Did you know that ADD and ADHD are three times more likely to be diagnosed in boys than in girls?!?

Did you know that the symptoms are different between boys and girls?  Girls tend to be more forgetful and disorganized rather than hyper or too busy, but ADD and ADHD come in all kinds of forms.

Being a parent, you never expect that YOUR child could be suffering from something like this, but it is definitely possible...Pay attention, see if your child needs help...you don't want them to be the kid at school that never pays attention, gets bad grades, or is always in trouble...help them.

If you have dealt with this and have any words of encouragement for my friend, please leave her some loving words on her blog. Thank you!

What if it's me? What if it's not?

For anyone who has been trying to get pregnant unsuccessfully for over a year (under 35 years old) or over 6 months (over 35 years old) both partners should get checked out...but sometimes, that is such a hard step to take. Some people are almost afraid to find out why taking temperatures, knowing the signs, and lots of sex don't work.

Many women assume it is them, while men assume that they are the reason that they are not getting two lines on a pregnancy test. Someone is going to feel at fault in their heart until there is a diagnosis, but there should be no finger pointing and no one should feel at fault. If it's a male fertility issue or a female one does not and should not matter, it is simply a fertility issue and it is something you and your spouse should work through together.

I have some dear friends who have been off of birth control for a few years, who have timed, temped, vacationed, relaxed, stressed, tested, and all of the stuff that people do after trying for sometime but they have not gone to see a Dr. yet...

They need to go see a Dr. They need to get everything checked out. You never know...the problem maybe something so easily fixable that it wouldn't take drastic measure to be able to hold that bundle of pure joy in your arms soon...or it might be a really tough journey ahead. There is no telling though, until you go get checked out. Both of you.

What could it hurt to find out? Probably nothing, unless one of you is willing to let it hurt your pride, your ego. If one person believes that it is their "fault" it will hurt...and I totally "get" that. I feel like it is my "fault" sometimes that I can't get pregnant...even though I know I had nothing to do with the medical situation I am in...

Bottom line...go get checked!

I've been robbed.

I feel like I've been robbed. I'm so....lost...frustrated...sad....and I know no one wants to hear it. My Love says he's done. Says he doesn't want any more kids. period. I feel like I've been robbed...

by the way...this is not his fault...I don't even blame him. Blame lies elsewhere.