I still don't have lemons...but I have a son.

I have an interesting story to share with you all. It may seem long, but it's true and it's...well, it's pretty amazing.

As many of you already know, My Love and I went through years of fertility treatments, without success, trying for a second child. We chose to stop that journey 2 years ago after yet another failed round of injections and insemination.

We never did anything to prevent another pregnancy, but since it didn't happen, over and over, we assumed it wouldn't. We actually were in the process of scheduling the big 'snip' for him because I didn't want the stress of the possibility any more. We were happy with our only and amazing daughter!

https://www.facebook.com/KatherineDPhotography

Anyhow, let me jump back about 3 years ago...

Picture this: Going through fertility treatments...daily injections...stress...crazy emotional roller coaster...every waking thought absorbed by baby brain...

I get a call out of the blue by my amazing and wonderful friend who lives in Florida. She is one of the most beautiful people you could ever hope to meet. Her heart is so giving and generous to so many. So she calls me out of the blue one day and says "I need your address. I have something to send to you." I give it to her and she simply says "I had a vision. I have something to send to you."....ummmm, ok.



So a bit later, I get this bubble wrap manilla envelope in the mail with a letter and a big rock inside of it. The rock seemed like some kind of quartz with blue in it...
The letter...well, the letter read something along the lines of "I had a vision about your future. There is a rock enclosed in the envelope. You need to meditate over this rock, saying this chant (I don't remember what it was...I think I still have the letter, and now I'm going to have to look for it). After that, you need to plant the rock with a fruit bearing tree. If you do this, you will have a son on March 15th."

Remember this part, mmmmkay!  "A SON.......ON MARCH 15TH....."

So, thinking..."no way will this work...I'll get around to it one day"...and I set it off to the side. I'd read the note now and then, pick up the rock, think about doing it, but to be honest...it seemed a bit weird, so I'd put it back down.

Well, fast forward to the past deployment, 2 years ago. A different friend and I traveled down to Florida and on our way home, we stopped to get some amazing wine and while we were there, I saw some lemon trees...thought, yum, I want a lemon tree and bought it. When I got home, I needed to pot this tree...so I said to myself, "Self, this tree bears fruit...you should toss that rock in the pot just to say you did it, mmmkay?"...so I did. And I didn't think much of it...I didn't do the chant or meditation or anything...I put the rock in with the tree and babied the crap out of the tree cause I wanted lemons (I STILL DON'T HAVE LEMONS!!).

Fast forward again to this past summer...I still track all of my cycles (they are not regular) and the symptoms of ovulation, so I had a fairly good idea of when things happened; however, we had seen these symptoms come and go many times without any reason to believe this time would be any different.

While we were camping in the mountains, I had a dream that I went to the bathhouse and when I walked in, this sweet, Southern black lady handed me a pregnancy test and told me I had to take it...and it was positive. I told Jeremiah about the dream and we laughed about it because neither of us even entertained the idea of that being possible...even mocking about how it was probably because we were talking about the big 'snip'.

As we're driving home later that week, I started thinking it was possible...but didn't want to get my hopes up or anything, so kept dismissing the idea. A few days after we were home, it kept creeping up on me, so finally I took a pregnancy test and it was, as you know, positive! HOLY CRAPOLA!!  That same week, my lemon tree made a baby lemon tree...WHAT?!?!  (it's true!!)

ANYHOW....so, being obsessive, I looked at my chart, determined when I ovulated (our 12th anniversary) and determined my due date was....wait for it...MARCH 15. I knew, then and there, this was a boy...and NEVER doubted it since then.

We did an ultrasound to estimate the due date because of my irregularity, and they gave me the due date of March 28...which I still am not sure of because since that date was given to us, EVERY measurement since has been 2 weeks big...putting the due date at...wait for it...MARCH 15. And, of course, we know that this little baby is ALL boy...(been confirmed multiple times).

So, all that being said, here is a photo of me, at 37 weeks, measuring 39 weeks and ready to meet this new little man in my life.

https://www.facebook.com/EmmaTerwilligerPhotography

So, basically, the gist of the whole story was that over 3 years ago, a distant, but wonderful friend predicted the sex and due date of this baby...now we'll see when he actually decides to come out. 

Regina, you are amazing and I love you. 

18 weeks tomorrow!

I'll be 18 weeks tomorrow. Feeling the baby move more and more...little wiggles in the tummy. It's a very good and re-assuring feeling. 

At my last OB appointment we scheduled my anatomy scan ultrasound for November 12. I'm excited, though a bit nervous for it. 

We also discussed how she would talk to the MFM (Maternal Fetal Medicine) (high risk) about monitoring me and the baby in the third trimester. Many women have issues with the first and second trimesters, but they (and I) are not worried about those two. The third trimester was the scariest one for me. That was when we almost lost my beautiful daughter. That was when my instincts were completely wrong. That was when the Dr's saved her life. When medical intervention was absolutely necessary...and I fought it. I couldn't be happier that they actually listened to my needs (so far) and are taking my concerns seriously.

That being said, I'm pretty sure I'll be doing an elective repeat C-section for this baby. I will not fight for a VBAC like I had really wanted at one time. I don't want to go through the hours and hours of labor just to end up with a C-section again anyway and a miserable recovery because of it. Also, I'll be able to schedule things easier: my mom to come help me, My Love to participate as much as possible from overseas, and my daughter to be taken care of.

I wasn't sure I wanted to do a "bumpdate"...for so long this has been an infertility blog...full of hopes and dashed hopes, full of pain and sorrow, full of stories of my older daughter and my wishes for her...but I AM pregnant again. There is no denying that and, in the end, this is my blog...so, here goes: 

How far along: 17 weeks 6 days!

How big is baby: bell pepper

I have been feeling: Tired, occasional headaches, have to pee...all the time, hungry, stuffy, swelling...

Total weight gain/loss? About 4lbs from my pre-pregnancy weight...but I think it's all in my boobs! 

Maternity clothes?  the belly band things from Target are my friend! Some maternity shirts and I only have one pair of maternity pants (capri's).

Sleep? I wake up a lot and should take naps more...

Best moment this week? Feeling much more baby flutters!

Food cravings? Nothing specific...cheesy things sometimes

Food aversions? super sweet things, fried things, meat

Gender?  your guess is as good as mine!

Labor signs? Thank God, no. 

Belly button in or out? in

What I miss? drinking a beer once in a while...or spiked coffee! 

What I’m looking forward to? My ultrasound in a few weeks
 
I’m worried about: is baby ok?

Bump? Yuppers!

October ICLW

Well hello there fellow bloggers! 
This is my 5th ICLW and I look forward to reading other's stories, finding some new blogs, and hopefully gaining a few more followers on mine. I haven't done this for since October of 2 years ago.



"It'll happen when you least expect it"
Well, I suppose that is a true statement for us...though NOT what you want to hear when TTC...trust me, I know!
We had a huge surprise this July when I found out I am pregnant with #2. I am 17 weeks right now and doing well, though I still have a hard time believing it's real sometimes. Especially after trying to conceive (TTC) for almost 5 years for a second child. We have a beautiful 6 year old daughter that is the light of our lives, but wanted so badly to give her a sibling.
I say this baby is a surprise because after all of the unsuccessful fertility treatments we truly thought that it just wasn't going to happen for us and we were to a point where we had accepted that. We had sold all of the baby items and though the thought never fully left the back of my mind when I'd see 'fertile' signs, I never thought I would ever see another pregnancy test with 2 lines.

Some history
I am 33 years old and My Love is 35 years old. We have been married over 12 years.

My Love is in the military and is always in and out of training and deployments, so TTC timing was always difficult, but we did fertility treatments for over 3 years, including supplements, weightloss (kind of minimal), fertility drugs, and 6 failed IUI's.


My daughter: At about 25-26 years old we decided to TTC #1...no cycles were happening for me though, a year later, went to the Dr....tests and tests and tests later, low and behold I have PCOS. Got on Metformin and Provera...2 cycles later, BFP! 9 months later and some pretty scary complications in the end...a beautiful baby girl! Her birth story.

Anyhow...5 years ago, in August, we started TTC#2...I was already on Metformin and taking Provera to get things going...
Not happening.
Seek RE.
Clomid resistant...start injectibles...
2 years of fertility injections,
6 IUI's,
all BFN's...
Only positive pregnancy test I've ever seen resulted in that beautiful baby above.

Just because I had one, didn't lessen the want or hurt for another, though I wish I could say it does. Secondary infertility is horrible and traumatizing and hard. I do have my daughter, yes, but I want so badly to give her a sibling, to give My Love another child, to hold another baby of mine in my arms (and hopefully not miss out on the birth!). I ached for this and because I have a young daughter, we go to school, birthday parties, and playdates with mom's who have had their 2nd and 3rd children in the time we had been trying for one more. I put a smile on my face and cried on the inside.

typical PCOS ovary w/1 large follicle

It was so difficult to talk to most anyone about infertility because so few people can truly comprehend it and when you're going through it, there isn't much else that you can think about. It's emotionally draining and time consuming...and it HURTS. This is why I started this blog so long ago.  Writing my blog and following others (some through successful pregnancies, and others that haven't hit that lotto yet) is what got me through the last many years.

My plan is NOT to turn this blog into a pregnancy blog, but I will occasionally post about the pregnancy. Not because I'm trying to hurt anyone going through fertility, but because we did end up with another chance...another miracle. 

Needless to say...someone is pretty excited!!

16 weeks pregnant...still seems weird to say...

I honestly never thought I'd be saying that I was pregnant again. I know that I am still having a hard time accepting and enjoying this pregnancy because of that. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy...but scared. I'm excited...but unsure. I have to admit that the Doppler Fetal Monitor that a friend is lending me is very, very helpful to become more excited about this whole thing. Hearing the baby move and kick and hearing the heartbeat is pretty cool.

See: 

I didn't move the wand while making this video.

I'm in my second trimester now and man, I couldn't be happier that the nausea has gone away almost completely!!!!!!! Oh morning, afternoon, and evening sickness SUCK! I was sick the WHOLE time with my daughter, so I'll take this blessing of not being sick right now. I'm also already showing. I never showed with my daughter until I was much further along.

I don't really have many baby things yet, but am working on figuring out what I will need. I know some things have changed and that some new research has come out about certain products so I am doing some research and taking suggestions. I'm not really worried about it because I know things will fall into place and I'll end up with the essentials for the baby.

It's not going to be the easiest pregnancy and birth to go through. Mostly because My Love will deploy while I am pregnant and will miss the birth and several months of the baby's life. Fortunately through technology, he will still get to see the baby and us. Also, we're lucky that we have many friends in the area and family that will visit to help things go smoothly.

Anyhow, I have been putting this post off long enough, it's time to post it!

Surprise! We're expanding the family a bit further...

In July we spent a week in the mountains of West Virginia riding our four-wheelers through the Hatfield-McCoy trails and had a blast!! While I was there, I had a dream that someone handed me a pregnancy test and I took it and it was positive...Ha!! Now, wouldn't THAT be funny??? 3 years of fertility treatments and we had stopped trying anything about a year and a half ago, just before when My Love deployed.

So, we get home, and I just can't shake the dream, or the feeling that something was different. I went to Dollar General and had to secretly ask for a test (because Lil One was in there and I didn't want her realizing what was happening). I went home and did the test that day...INSTANTLY, this is what I saw:

I was in shock...complete and absolute shock...I told My Love to come see and he was in shock as well...neither of us expected that!
We went to the Dr later that week and confirmed via bloodtest...I'm PREGNANT!
Didn't have any idea how far along I really was because of the PCOS and irregular cycles, so we did a couple of quantitative HCG count tests and an Ultrasound later on. Apparently I'm about 10 weeks now (I thought I'd be closer to 12, at least).

So, without further ado...let me introduce our NEWEST addition..."gummy bear"

We are excited though cautious. This was obviously not planned, but definitely a blessing!

I guess we just had to "stop trying" and "relax" and "get rid of all of our baby stuff" and "give it time" and blah, blah, blah...I've never believed in all of that, but I do believe in miracles...heck, I have one already!!

Oh, and our last "new addition" of Sable, our "puppy"...she is a HUGE dog! She's smart and goofy and so incredibly lovey! She loves to play fetch and wrestle!
Here is a photo of her (Sable, (the dark one) 6 months) with our 10.5 year old (silver) Weimaraner, Bailey.